No malice no anger

Regret
yes

I was aware
of my father's
illness
long
before it killed
him

I made
him cry about
it once

He
knew the way
he
acted sometimes was
wrong

but there
was no control over it
therapy whether pharmacutical or theraputic
would never be an option

He lived and
suffered with bi-polar
at least
20
years

He saw us
through our childhood
then had to leave

Perhaps from fear of
embarassing
us
with what he knew
was probably
a downward
spiraling
illness

He
ultimately
treated himself
as an animal
that needed
to be put down