Aug 25, 2006

Sleep patterns

For seven years
I slept with someone so angry
she would fall asleep in the middle of yelling at me.
There was so much angry whispering at bed time.
If I tried to leave the room
she would fall down in front of the door crying,
begging me not to leave.
I felt helpless,
uncertain I could make it on my own.
Children in the house.
So I was thankful
when she fell asleep mid argument.
I drifted off only to be awakened an hour later
when she roused and remembered her thoughts.

Eventually I gathered my strength and got her out.

For two years I slept alone on my side of the bed.
Waking up every morning to find the covers on her side of the bed perfectly smooth and unwrinkled.
The memory of her bitterness embedded in my subconcious, keeping me away from the other side of the bed.

Scanner collage of the child I lost regaining peace.

It's been three and a half years since I've seen her but she'll always be my child.
I now sleep in the whole bed and I awoke this morning hugging a pillow.


heatherpink said...

Awww, what a cute baby.
I wish you could see her.

Jozee said...

Thank you Heather. I believe I will again some day.